Don't Forget the Milk

More than once, I have gone to the grocery store for milk and come home with other items that caught my eye but having forgotten to get the milk I went there to buy.  Hence, The List.  Since my teens, I have surrounded myself with visual reminders- written ‘to-do’ lists, pictures and paintings of what is most important, ‘gems of wisdom,’ all of which serve to remind me not to return home without what I came for.  However, to be effective, the list must contain the essential needs AND, I must check the list to make sure I put all the required items in the basket.

            Pres. Spencer W. Kimball taught, “. . . Immortality and Eternal Life constitute the sole purpose of life.”  

(Catholic) Bishop J. Sheen noted that: “Each of us comes into life with fists closed, set for aggressiveness and acquisition. But when we abandon life our hands are open; there is nothing on earth that we need, nothing the soul can take with it.”  

There is much on earth that we need to sustain us while we are here and much that we can wisely acquire and use to accomplish the Lord’s purposes; but if acquisition becomes an end it itself we will find upon returning to Our Father that we have come home without the milk.  May it not be so is my prayer for myself and all of us.            

Peacock in a Tree

Like discovering an elegantly colored peacock in a barren tree on a an overcast day, humor reveals the bright little delights in dark or dreary times.

This can’t be true I hoped desperately as I gazed at the foamy blob seeping into my hair.  You know you are too rushed when you grab the nearest spray can and finish off your hair with bathroom cleaner.   I hate being late.  I hate being disorganized.  But the ‘hurrier I go, the behinder I get,’ a gem of wisdom scrawled onto some crafter’s plaque reminds me.  I blotted the cleaner off my hair as well as I could and arrived at church with very visible evidence that I was definitely experiencing a ‘bad hair day.’ 

Someone once said (sorry, I have tried in vain to find the author), that “Our strength as humans is that we can laugh at ourselves for being ridiculous.  Our weakness is that we have to do it so often.”  When you are rushing so as not to be late because you hate being late and then do something as ridiculous as spray bathroom cleaner on your hair which only makes you show up not only even later but looking ridiculous, you can respond in several ways—cry, scream in anger and frustration—or, laugh.  I have tried all of these responses through the years and can testify that the only response that actually helps get through the ridiculously frustrating stress-related disasters is laughter.  Sure the mess needs to be cleaned up, the being late, the inconveniences and problems caused to others must be addressed.  However, the debilitating frustration, anger and stress are best defused with laughter.  It cleanses and heals and strengthens me to face the challenges and move forward.  All one needs to do is to see an elephant seal or blue-footed booby (a peliagic bird) to know that Heavenly Father has a sense of humor.   I believe the ability to laugh, even in the dark, is another of God’s gifts to not only survive but to enjoy the journey.

 

Life Does Not Have to be Perfect

"Life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful."             Annette Funicello

Annette Funicello was a "mouseketeer" on the Disney special, The Mickey Mouse Show, which premiered during the mid 1950's.  I watched it at 5:00 pm each day at the house of a neighbor, the only one on the block to have the new luxury, a television set.  Cartoons were interspersed with singing, dancing and skits by a group of young teens in beanie caps adorned with large mouse ears.  Later, Annette was the one playing volleyball on the beach in a modest one-piece bathing suit in the Disney Beach Party mindless teen movies.  Disney stars signed contracts requiring modest dress on and off the set, no smoking or other behavior unbefitting a role model. His goal was clean, happy entertainment.  But I digress.  Annette blossomed into a vibrant young beauty and was in several movies and had several TV appearances.    She surprised many when upon her big Catholic wedding announced she intended to leave show business to focus on a career as a wife and mother.  Later, as a mother of teen-agers, she did some Skippy peanut butter commercials with her kids and some reunion shows.  Then what some would call tragedy hit.  She was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and this once beautiful dancer walked first with a cane and then not at all.  She continues to live with the same grace and cheerfulness and it was in this phase of her life that she asserted, "Life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful."

That phrase runs through my mind often.  It reminds me to keep my eyes and ears and heart open to the gifts and joys around me even in the most difficult and trying times.  I don't want the shadows to keep me from recognizing and enjoying the bright spots in each day.  I am consciously choosing to savor, linger where I can and fully enjoy each good and pleasant moment.  Cumulatively, the moments do more than sustain me during difficulties-- they lessen the impact of the painful and weighty elements;  and I find myself less rattled by the insignificant- and less shaken by the significant losses and blows.  I am more grateful and at peace than I was in younger years and trust that all will work together for my eternal good regardless of what "tragedies" I and my loved ones will pass through.   Thanks, Annette.

Good-bye, Lizzie- We love you!

Yesterday on Easter, between dinner and dessert, Lizzie was ‘put to sleep.’    Lizzie had suffered for sometime with arthritis so my daughter thought that when she was having difficulty getting up, it was another flare-up of the familiar pain and stiffness and she increased the anti-inflammatory medication.    Lizzie’s condition  deteriorated throughout Saturday night and Easter Sunday so by late afternoon she refused food and water and was panting and crying out in pain.  My daughter called the vet who explained he was celebrating with his family, not only Easter, but also his wife’s birthday but if we would be willing to wait, he

 would meet us at the animal hospital about 6:10 pm.  We brushed and stroked Lizzie and tried in vain to make her comfortable until we met the vet and he gave her a  sedative.  An  exam revealed a baseball size tumor beneath her full coat and an X-ray displayed a grossly enlarged liver displacing her stomach.  My daughter and her children tearfully hugged and caressed their good-byes and with the vet’s help her spirit slipped quietly from her tortured body. 

 On March 13, 1996, Elisabeth, my daughter’s firstborn, was born and died.  An ultrasound early in the pregnancy revealed a hole in the diaphragm that meant the chances of the baby’s survival outside the womb were slim.  An abortion was suggested by the medical personnel but rejected by my daughter who left that decision to a loving and all-knowing  Heavenly Father.  A later ultrasound revealed a fast-growing brain tumor that dropped the baby’s chance of survival from slim to zero.  There were loving, tender miracles granted by Heavenly Father surrounding the tiny girl’s short life but in the end, her parents named her Elisabeth, meaning “consecrated to God” and Elisabeth died peacefully in her mother’s arms.   The pain of the loss was heavy and long.   Hoping to ease her pain and help her heal, my daughter’s husband presented her with a lively puppy- a German-short-hair and malamute mix.  My daughter asked, “can we name her Lizzie?” The healing began.  Lizzie was smart and oozed personality.  As she faced heartbreak through the years, Lizzie was her comfort and joy.  As three children followed Elisabeth, Lizzie became their protector and playmate and the 100 lb. giant endured their pulling and poking with patience.

I am among a small body of Christians who believe that God loves all his creations and not only us, His children, will enjoy the gift of resurrection but all of his creatures will live again in immortal resurrected bodies.  Lizzie filled the measure of her creation and helped those who loved her overcome the challenges of this life.  We look forward to throwing Lizzie’s ball for her in the eternities.  

Taken on August 10, 2007.  Lizzie stood on her hind legs with her front paws leaning up against the trunk of the apple tree.  She sniffed each apple within reach and carefully selected one.  Protective of her apple, she carried it inside into the family room where she carefully ate it one dainty bite at a time . . . core and all.

Lizzie relaxing on the couch.

My Husband Makes Me Laugh . . .

 “Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life . . .” Ecclesiastes 9: 9

Every time I see a spider on the wall or empty the mop bucket, my husband makes me laugh.   Or select one of four beaters for my self-charging mixing Black and Decker “Gizmo” (the actual name of the device.)  My husband loves electric ‘gizmos’ of many kinds.  He is fascinated by the creative solutions to life’s little problems or ways to make onerous tasks easier.  Years ago while making French toast, I commented that I needed a new egg-beater because the beaters on mine were bent and the handle had fallen off making it unusable.   Soon after that simple observation, my husband presented my with the Black & Decker Gizmo which he thoughtfully mounted on the wall under the kitchen cupboard. 

 

I don’t like spiders in the house and have even been known to wake up screaming from spider nightmares;  which explains why my last birthday gift from my husband-- who spends considerable thought and time coming up with ways to make my life easier and more pleasant-- presented me with a spider vacuum. He was eager for me to open the gift, waiting anxiously for my reaction.  Who would have known such a thing even existed?   After taking it all in, all I could do was laugh.  It was SO like him-  trying to ease my fear of spiders- with cutting edge technology!  I hugged him  and thanked him for the gift.   He has given me flowers and jewelry.   But the gifts that truly come from his heart and show his love for me are re-chargeable battery operated.  Well- except for the bed fan.  It plugs in with an adapter.  

 A box was delivered by UPS one day.  “It’s a present for you,” he announced.   He saw it while perusing a magazine during a flight while travelling for work.  It is designed to blow air (at variable speeds) between the sheets to help ease the agony of constant hot flashes.  Anything he could do 

to ease my suffering would make him happy.  He makes me happy.

 

Which brings us to emptying the mop bucket.  His latest wonderful idea was to install an automatic towel dispenser over the utility sink in the laundry room.  It’s motion activated so every time I dump the mop water down the sink, wipe the counter, rinse the mud off the grandkids' shoes or clean the sink,  the towel dispenser notices my movement and growls out a length of paper towel---  which makes me laugh!  It makes me laugh and think of my ever thoughtful, problem-solving, electronic-gadget-loving husband.  

Other wives can keep the perfume, elegant lingerie, jewelry.  My husband did buy me  pearl necklaces (one black pearls and one white pearls) with matching earrings.  Pearls the size of marbles.  Much bigger than any pearls you’ve previously seen the ad touted, he told me.   He was concerned that after they arrived in the mail that I wouldn’t like them because they were flawed pearls.  (But look at the SIZE of those pearls!)   Anyway, my husband loves me; and I love him.  He makes me laugh.